The Battle of Epping Forest

Lyrics:

[Instrumental Intro 00:00-01:14]

[Verse 1]
Along the Forest Road, there's hundreds of cars – luxury cars
Each has got its load of convertible bars, cutlery cars – superscars!
For today is the day when they sort it out, sort it out
'Cause they disagree on a gangland boundary
'Cause they disagree on a gangland boundary

[Verse 2]
There's Willy Wright and his boys – one helluva noise, that's Billy's boys!
With fully-fashioned bugs, that's Little John's thugs
The Barking Slugs – supersmugs!
For today is the day when they sort it out, sort it out
Yes, these Christian soldiers fight to protect the poor
East end heroes got to score in

[Chorus]
The Battle of Epping Forest
Yes, it's the Battle of Epping Forest
Right outside your door
And you ain't seen nothing like it
No, you ain't seen nothing like it
Not since the Civil War

[Middle Eight]
Coming over the hill are the boys of Bill and Johnny's lads stand very still
With the umpire's shout, they all start to clout – there's no guns in this gentleman's bout
And Georgie moves in on the outside left with a chain flying 'round his head
And Harold Demure, from Art Literature, nips up the nearest tree (Here come the cavalry!)
Amidst the battle roar accountants keep the score: 10-4
They've never been alone, after getting a radiophone
The bluebells are ringing for Sweetmeal Sam, real ham
Handing out bread and jam just like any picnic
Picnic, Picnic, Picnic

[Instrumental Intro 00:00-01:14]

[Chorus]
The Battle of Epping Forest
Yes, it's the Battle of Epping Forest
Right outside your door
And you ain't seen nothing like it
No, you ain't seen nothing like it
Not since the Civil War

[Chorus]
That's why we're in the Battle of Epping Forest
Yes, it's the Battle of Epping Forest
Right outside your door
We guard your souls for peanuts
And we guard your shops and houses
For just a little more, just a little more

[Middle Eight]
In with a left hook is the Bethnal Green Butcher, but he's countered on the right by Mick's chain-gang fight
And Liquid Len, with his smashed bottle men, is lobbing Bob the Nob across the gob
With his kisser in a mess, Bob seems under stress, but Jones the Jug hits Len right in the mug
And Harold Demure, who's still not quite sure, fires acorns from out of his sling (Here come the cavalry!)
Up, up above the crowd, inside their Silver Cloud, done proud
The bold and brazen brass, seen darkly through the glass
The butler's got jam on his Rolls; Roy doles out the lot
With tea from a silver pot just like any picnic
Picnic, Picnic, Picnic

[Instrumental Break 09:37-10:05]

[Outro]
Along the Forest Road, it's the end of the day and the Clouds roll away
Each has got its load – they'll come out for the count at the break-in of day
When the limos return for their final review, it's all through, all they can see is the morning goo
“There's no-one left alive – must be a draw.”
So the Blackcap Barons toss a coin to settle the score

[Instrumental Outro]